I am what I am not; just a little

I am not a race car driver or an idiot. I am not a weapon or a waste can. I am not a fig or any other dried piece of fruit. I don't rot on command. I don't live outside of the work week. I don't walk my dogs enough or change the oil on time. I still haven't filed my taxes. (Shhhh....). I don't spell well. I don't speak up. Enough. I am not a nice guy. I am a girl. A lady. A ma'am. I sleep too much. I am a find. A fine set of binoculars. I am the one who blew out all her birthday candles. I am the one who gets her wish. Swishing in her dishes, I am not the one who does them. This year.